[Narrator] Ho! Ho! Ho! It’s the holidays, ladies and gentlemen, and you know what that means! [Salesman] Thanksgiving rolls around and I move into your neighborhood Setting up shop to sell your seasonal favorite wood I live in a shack it looks like I’m ice fishing My mission is to sell you trees for your Christmas wishing I work on commission so I got no inhibitions My ambition is to move this merch no matter your religion I’m used to street selling, if you know what I mean ‘Cause the rest of the year I sell a different kind of green But now my scene is clean, or as clean as it can be When I’m living in a trailer and it’s 25 degrees My trees will be pleaning, even though I’m out here freezing ‘Cause this holiday hustle is my reason for the season Santa’s got nothing on me Without my trees where would the presents be? So come to my spot and do Christmas right Knock on my window, wake me up, ’cause I’m here all night [singers] I’m your janky Christmas tree,
I’m your janky Christmas tree, I’m your janky Christmas tree salesman I’m your janky Christmas tree,
janky Christmas tree, janky Christmas tree salesman Awake straight for 8 days, I’m crazy and dazed I got an ornament and Silent Night is all that it plays Just come down and hang out, ’cause I’m stuck in the snow It gets slow and there’s no WiFi for my HBOGo So visit me and get a tree for holiday cheer I’ll be sitting right here just sneaking a few beers I may be a little drunk but I can still trim your trunk and if you’re cute I’ll share the smoke that I got tucked in my bunk I’m your janky Christmas tree, janky Christmas tree janky Christmas tree salesman [salesman] you’re gonna need a stand with that [narrator] Janky Christmas Tree Salesman! He’s on your block and within your budget! Ha ha! I’m right down the block! Woosh. woosh.